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Issue 4
6 Bad Hankshake Habits
1. The Dominator/The Lesser: The Dominator occurs when someone faces their palm towards the ground when giving a handshake. This says you’re a controlling and aggressive person. The Lesser is the opposite, and occurs when some-one faces their palms towards the sky when giving a handshake. This says you’re subservient and willing to be controlled. Neither is acceptable, so try a firm and vertical handshake to convey equality.
2. The Freezie Shake- Whether you’ve just come in from the cold, or the AC is up too high, shaking with your icicle fingers is not a good idea. At gatherings try to hold cold drinks in the left hand, and if you get a chance heat your hands up before greeting others. This frigid shake should be reserved for The Abominable Snowman and Canadians only.
3.The Big Squeeze Shake- For some pain is a game, especially those guys who shake hands like it’s a contest. This is rude to other men and women, and unless you’re trying to insult others, avoid this shake and go for a firm but normal one.
4. The Condolence Shake- This handshake occurs when someone shakes your hand normally, but then puts their other hand on your arm or shoulder. Unless you’re at a funeral giving condolences, or you’re in a position to play a fatherly figure, avoid it. Others will find your ‘touchy’ handshake too much.
5. The Left-Hander- Some people just don’t care about social etiquette, and decide to throw in the curve ball of handshakes. This shake requires more attention since left-handed shakes are rare. Try not to be offended by it, and examine if the person is carrying anything in his right hand. If you’re in the position of having no hands, a polite nod will do just fine.
6. The Valley Shake- This hand shake is particular to Valley, and is the universal handshake for men under the age of 25. You do a normal ‘bro’ handshake with the quick slap of hands, but the Valley adds on a knuckle-to-knuckle tap after the initial handshake. A must-know shake if you’re going to a party where you’ll be greeting other men, but don’t try this one in formal situations such as at the office.
- John Gallagher
